Everyone of us are members in a variety of groups that help us form multiple relationships. Each of these relationships has the tendency to influence our thoughts, decisions, and ultimately our behavior. Sure, we’d like to believe that we are the sole creators of our destinies. (Although when things go wrong, we find it difficult to accept responsibility for our actions. But that’s a different blog altogether.)
The facts are each of us are subtly shaped by the small hints thrown out during a conversation with friends or the blank expression that came across the face of a relative when you were pouring your heart out. Admit it. We are all influenced by variables outside of ourselves.
This is not a criticism but an opportunity to admit to this phenomenon of sorts. This isn’t as easy as it sounds because, once again, doing so can stir feelings of vulnerability. However, feeling vulnerable can be a gateway to healing.
Relationships are fragile like a crystal Fabergé Egg. They are expensive and beautiful, but easily damaged and broken. This reality regarding relationships causes many of us to reshape how we respond to the people that make up these tedious ties. We start to do things, specific things to sustain them. Just like at crystal Fabergé Egg, we handle them with care to avoid destroying them but a lot of times it’s at the cost of our own self-expression.
Consider the many relationships you’re in. Now, consider what you’ve invested to maintain them. Just like that crystal Fabergé Egg, they are beautiful to look at, but they’ve required the most delicate care. No relationship is worth the cost of our self-expression and individuality. Be kind to yourself. Be true to yourself. It’s time to develop and groom healthy relationships in all camps of life.
Step one admit to how you have allowed others to influence your decisions. Although you may fail or fall, you’ll gain a wealth of knowledge from the experience that would have otherwise been lost. Then, believe that you have everything you need to make the right decisions concerning your life. We must learn to trust that still small voice on the inside and the more we listen and heed to it, the stronger it becomes. Finally, Take the challenge and create healthy boundaries around all your relationships. You don’t have to rigidly alienate yourself from others. Just be careful not to substitute their opinions for your own. Sure, it will take some time and yes, you’ll start out feeling uncomfortable. But these small seeds will yield a bountiful harvest of confidence and respect. Go Ahead…start handling yourself with care.