Updated: Oct 2
Anger, a powerful, complex, default emotion. It is this emotion that we default to for more comfort and ease. It’s easier to be angry than fearful, shameful, or vulnerable. Anger is empowering and as misleading as it sounds, it works like a fuel that ignites us. It is a complex, tangled web of emotions wrapped into a neat package. Anger is our "go-to" weapon that defends us from appearing weak.
Anger is not a "bad" emotion. Although, if you fight it, suppress it, or remain unaware of how it can affect thoughts and behavior, it can become an enemy. Anger is a defense mechanism that attempts to defend us against feeling exposed, guilty, or “not-good-enough.” It fights for our self-worth and diminished self-esteem. If someone hurls an insult at us, anger says, "No way, I don't have to take that. I will not be embarrassed, hurt, or feel belittled...at least I won’t show it."
Anger can serve as a release, especially when we strive to make "good" impressions on certain people or pride ourselves in being in control. However, this does not exempt us from feeling angry. We’ve just gotten good at suppressing it and pushing it down. This helps us appear “cool-calm-and-collected" on the outside for a period. But eventually all things come to an end and when that period is over, all that suppressed anger is going to spill out. The problem becomes with when and how it spills out. It may not happen at the best or opportune time.
Anger in suppression mode also runs havoc on our physical, mental, and spiritual well-being. The stress of suppressing or ignoring emotions will take it’s toll on the body and mind. The Bible shares wisdom on this matter in Ephesian 4:26, “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger…”ESV. Our emotions are a gift. There's no sin in being angry but don't allow anger to rule your day, spoil your attitude, alienate you from loved ones, or cause you to keep on a mask. Learn to get reconnected with your emotions. You deserve to live a full life as the authentic person that you were created to be and that involves re-learning to express your emotions appropriately. This offers a fresh perspective to living. Don't be afraid or unsure about removing the "Anger Mask." You'll be glad you did.